Secondary Benefit, The Hidden Saboteur
Secondary benefit (or secondary gain) is the term for when you have a sort of “hidden” reason for the problem you are struggling with. For example, if you want to lose weight, but keep finding yourself going back and forth, up and down, then perhaps there is a subconscious (let’s call it less-than-obvious) reason for it.
In this article, we will discuss some of those possible reasons.
Weight Pains And Hassles
You may already be very clear that excess weight has caused you suffering and hassle in your life in so many ways. Clothes not fitting right, embarrassed about the way you look, uncomfortable the way you feel – even joint pain, etc.
Maybe you really want to be able to get down on the floor to play with your grandchildren.
Those are all real reasons that you would want to make a positive change.
But how about the reasons underneath all of that – which have kept you from your weight loss goals?
Our minds are fascinating. We are designed to save time and energy in all that we do. It is an on-purpose, evolutionary design. Our brains don’t want to spend excess time and energy doing things that we don’t think we need to.
However, our brains also don’t have the full “map” of what those things are.
For example… think about a time when you learned something new that saved you time, money, or energy. Or perhaps even saved you embarrassment (another certain kind of currency).
When you discovered this “new way”, you simply did it. Right? You simply stopped doing the old way that was wasting your time and energy.
Maybe you discovered a faster route to work. Maybe you found out that keeping an umbrella in the car avoids wasted time worrying about if it’s going to rain. Did you know that putting tin foil shiny-side-down keeps your food hotter longer? If you didn’t already know that, now you know – so it would only make sense that you will use it that way from now on.
Our minds are always on the prowl for new and better ways – ways that are faster and easier – to do things. Our lives are full of these “secret agendas”.
Sometimes those motivators work for your benefit. However, sometimes they do not, if we don’t fully realize all the ramifications of what we are doing – or when we don’t yet realize that there is a better way.
Weight Loss Blocks
When it comes to weight problems, there are many possible reasons that a person could be struggling with losing it. It is not possible to discuss them all in one article. What follows are a few possibilities.
Keep in mind that, often, there are more than one of these secondary benefits running at once.
• Weight gain as a method to avoid complements – If a person has a low self esteem in the first place, then, when they get compliments, they feel awkward about it. This awkwardness what we call a “content mismatch” where the feedback they are getting in the outside world (from a friend or coworker, for example) does not match what they believe about themselves. Since the brain tries to prove itself right, it does not naturally accept the compliment.
• A person who has a hard time losing weight because they are eating for comfort. The “reward” for the action of eating is immediate. They become “satisfied” quickly. However, the brain does not always realize the long-term inevitable disappointment, let-down, and cycle of pity and destruction. So, they aren’t necessarily making that connection at that time. So, the comfort, itself, has become a secondary reason for the eating, and thus overweight.
• How about a person who is resenting their spouse for whatever reason… Extra weight is a “great way” to keep that person away. Obviously, the consequences of the overweight hurts, but the mind considers it to be a very effective means to keeping the relationship “less stressful”. Again, of course, we often don’t always realize how much harm – and thus stress – we are really doing to ourselves and others, until much later in the game.
Your Screening Is Free
At the hypnosis center, we discuss, in-depth, what is happening with you. We will discuss your needs and what you will need to learn and practice in order to get your results.
Hypnotic suggestion is a powerful thing. It would be wonderful to just give one suggestion and expect that to last forever, without any need for further learning. But, I have learned over the years, that without addressing the real core needs, too, the hypnotic suggestions fail.
Written Service Guarantee
If you ever go back to your problem, our services are free of charge. That’s right. Really. If you need further support or just a “brush up”, simply call. Also, if you need extra sessions to reach you desired results and goals, you get free sessions, one per month, until you reach your desired results. We stay with the problem until you are happy.